My first roller derby bout.

I went to my first roller derby bout this past Saturday!  It was The Eastern Iowa Outlaws vs. The Oskaloosa Mayhem Girls (OMG).  The Outlaws are the "home" team.  They practice here at the youth center twice a week.
 
The Five Flags Center is in Dubuque.  I had never been there before and we were a little unsure where it was.  We pulled up to a corner where a guy was standing outside smoking...in front of a bar.  I asked for directions, please.  When he was having trouble navigating the curb, I was thinking I asked the wrong person.  He made it to the truck without falling down and he gave me slow and deliberate account of where to go.  Luckily we were on the correct street.  "Just keep going until you can't go no more then take a right."  We thanked him.  Sounds easy enough and it was. 

We found a public parking lot because all the ones along the center were reserved.  They had meters in the lot but that was for the hours of 8:00 a.m. and 5:00 p.m.  I hope.  It was after 6:30 p.m. and I didn't have any change anyway.  The people from Chicago put in a dollars’ worth just for good measure.

I bought my tickets in advance so we didn't have to wait in line, just walked in, picked up our VIP passes to sit in the reserved seating.  I bought a beer, talked with the team manager, he said he was going to present me with a check during half time.  Cool!

Clayton and Matthew came in.  I gave them their passes.  And said I'd buy their first round but they had to go get it.  They brought Jim and I one also....with my money.  Jim was driving so, I drank that one too. 

The announcer starts explaining the rules and how the scoring takes place.  I understood part of it but I’ve had almost three beers by this time. He introduced the OMG then The Outlaws.  

THE PACK: Consists of 3 BLOCKERS from each team and a PIVOT who wears a stripe on her helmet. 

THE JAMMER: One from each team.  Has a start on her helmet.

Side note:  The Pivot and the Jammer where a cover over their helmets that has the stripe and the star so they can remove it and someone else can take those positions.

A single whistle blow from the ref gets the PACK skating.  The PIVOTS set the pace for the PACK.

A double whistle low and the JAMMERS start skating.

The JAMMERS approach the PACK, the BLOCKERS and the PIVOTS try to stop the opposing team’s JAMMER from getting through. 

The first JAMMER who makes it through the PACK becomes the LEAD JAMMER.  To make it legally through the PACK a JAMMER must remain on the track when she passes each player and not receive any penalties.

MINOR PENALTIES: One short whistle, illegal blocking not deemed a serious threat, 4 minors equals one minute in the penalty box.

MAJOR PENALTY: One long whistle, illegal blocking deemed a serious threat, equals one minute in the penalty box, 3 majors in one period equals fouling out.

SCORING POINTS:  Both JAMMERS can begin to win points for their team after making it through the PACK once.  JAMMERS score a point for every opposing team’s player they pass in a lap, including the opposing JAMMER.

Two halves, each 30 minutes long. 

Ruby DoomsDay sang the National Anthem.  She sang it like it should be sung!  It gave you goose bumps.

Jim and Matt were picking up on the scoring system.  Clayton probably was too but he was sitting on the other side of Matt.  I was drinking.  Jim would lean in and say the score before the score girl (kind of like a ring girl for boxing) would walk our direction with the score on a wipe off board held high.  He was right.

V-Train and Kissta Koncrete were the high scorers for the Outlaws.  They were in the lead at half time 69 to 47. 

I was called down to center ring to be presented with a check.  They thanked me (the city) for letting them practice and making it affordable (that’ll change!  Kidding.) and as their “charity” of the month, presented the parks department with a check for $500.00.  I couldn’t believe it!  Of course I thanked them, told them how much I enjoyed having them at the Berndes Center, that we had a lot of needs and the check will help a great deal.  I also told Jim, Matt and Clayton to quit laughing at me.  I only had two and a half beers at this point.

Matt bought a round for the second half.  I told the guys it was pretty sad that these two had to spend their Saturday night with their boss.  They didn’t seem to mind and they really didn’t have to but I appreciate it that they did.  I don’t think anyone else from town was there.

Matt and I yelled for V-Train and Kissta.  We all clapped when points were being made.  I think I was catching on the scoring system.  I know we all had fun.  We were laughing and helping with the chants.  It was exciting and fun.  Something the whole family could enjoy. 

The Eastern Iowa Outlaws won 189 to 99. 

Jim decided we would stop at Taco John’s after he filled my truck up.  It works for me!  Then we went across the street to the DQ for a shake, mine was chocolate.

I was back home a little before 11:00.  I told myself I wasn't getting up until I felt like it.  That turned out to be 5:00 a.m.  I guess I felt like it.